A Perfect Murder

Things were so bad as they looked,
I was left all alone, just not booked,
Determined to cause that damage,
I really had to start from first page,

I was totally mad on her, for this,
She repudiated to give even a kiss,
Calling me hopeless, good for nothin’,
Her words hurt me like a bee sting,

I was determined to prove so much,
Even they do it, Pakistanis and Dutch,
It is not new for this world to know,
I am THE Man, I simply cannot bow,

My anger grew wilder and stronger,
I just couldn’t stay calm, any longer,
I madly searched for a bigger knife,
Get rid of it all and change my life,

I finally wanted to teach a lesson,
To reduce the pain, yeah., lessen,
How dare she talk to me like that,
Its even worse than Mortal Combat,

I decided to kill and keep it in freeze,
But, I was soft more than a breeze,
God, why do you do all this to me,
If it stinks, I will throw it in the sea,

The gas cylinder am sure is just fine,
Well, right time, it is just over nine,
She was there watching TV, in room,
I’d first distract her with that broom,

Make her unconscious, yeah, I must,
But, I need to wash and must dust,
Shred into pieces without any noise,
Oh ! You will agree, am I right Boys ?

But, what is the right knife to use,
For someone who’d simply refuse,
Should I really use some frying pan,
Should I do it under the noisy fan?

But, I must clear even one small trace,
And wipe all the sweat from my face,
Quietly accomplish everything soon ,
I don’t care if it is one curse or boon,

“ Do you know to cook chicken fry ?”
“ With salt, pepper and chillies, dry,”
Such an insult for a Good Chef, to be
How rude, cruel, can she be, to me?

Finally accomplished with all my might,
It was one of those spectacular sight,
Table set, and dinner ready for two,
More than enough, for me and you.

Marriage Alliance - Request

One request for everyone in here,
Pass this on to your near and dear,
For all the alliance posts, I do read,
For all, even against, cast or creed,

Indian marriage is a stranger event,
Ruled by color, district and accent,
Love is not seen as the top priority,
Religion, is the supreme authority,

Bound by laws and rules of a state,
Rules changed, like words on slate,
Re-phrased for one’s convenience,
Sometimes beyond common sense,

It’s so bad to see criteria on posts,
Do we really see that, in our Dosts,?
I fail to understand this big thing,
That big gap until the wedding ring!

Starts with horoscope matches first,
Stars should match, he rehearsed,
The date of birth does not match,
Even the birds’ eggs won’t hatch ?

Sitting on top of cycle of evolution,
We still yet to find a good solution,
Salary slips now weighing a person,
Will it do good or let things worsen,

He cannot support my daughter then,
She is in IT, won’t be back before ten,
He smokes and drinks, at the parties,
She will not look good in her forties !

Her father left them, before ten years,
His kith and kin drink, loads of beers,
Her sister was married to another caste,
His grandpa lost money in some past,

We are living in the generation best,
It’s time we come off good old nest,
Do get to know your partner at first,
Before you say he is good or at worst,

So many things driving this marriage,
Love betwixt hearts, off the carriage,
I am sitting here baffled without a clue,
Should that, at all bother me and you.

Chetan Bhagat - Two States

Chetan Bhagat’s book on 2 states,
As usual about money, sex and dates,
That book does try grabbing interest,
Some facts really are hard to digest,

Two characters with no real deeds,
They have their own desires, needs,
Why are all IITians shown to be bad?
It truly is weird, crazy, really so sad,

Krish and Ananya, it revolves around,
Who wait to fight on proving ground,
All our Moms and Dads aren’t for love,
Just glad to hear Namaste, gently bow,

But, why do you despise one from South?
Been long carried by a word of mouth,
Times have changed from idly, chutney,
We have moved so far, beyond Britney!

False feeling for someone from North,
Has stayed, ne’er moved back and forth,
Northies are seen as big money busters,
A real bad fact, that causes big flusters,

I am not chanting on changing your idea,
You can love anyone, Sita, Begum or Maria,
Same applies for ladies, on your partner,
Take your pick, Ram, Abdul, Chris Gartner,

Why don’t girls like guys with moustache?
Like it pricks like cactus, some kind of rash,
Stylish they are, Moustaches and the beard,
Did Ajay Devgan, in Ganga jal, look weird?

Brown or Milky, color does not matter,
Roti or Idli, what matters is the batter,
There is nothing inspiring in this read,
Just buy one, if at all, you really need,

I don’t really bother about ONE country,
Or really try offending any family tree,
Just don’t pick anything you don’t like,
And then complain about a big tax hike,

Don’t have to let go yourself always for love,
Just ‘cause, he or she is your teddy or dove,
Whatever is destined for you, it will come,
I know many will disagree, but for some,

I don’t indict two hearts falling in love,
And forget the one, who is all above,
Bad language cannot be a truly good sign,
Truly, Sex has no affinity after good wine,

Of course, I’m not against using foul words,
I use them at times, more than the nerds,
Somehow this book is a bit anachronous,
I’d have preferred reading in my school bus,

My personal comment on the 2 States,
All that I told her and my best mates,
Punjab is Solid, with no seas around,
Chennai is Liquid, with seas surround,

Gas is all that escapes through my ears,
Really good read, after couple of beers,
South or North, it could happen to you,
Let’s not discuss, between me and you.

Axe - Effect

Axe will never get you to work,
For anyone from CEO to a clerk,
There is a big dark temptation,
For this across this big nation,

Is it good, the dark Chocolate?
And we are easily made to bait,
Are you thinking of some SPICE?
Not to stink like one dead mice,

It is all simply one big MIRAGE,
Delusion to get a nice massage,
Software engineers prefer Java,
Want to be hot as molten Lava,

Does it work like magic, Voodoo,
Jump like a monkey, in some zoo,
Did you check out, the new Pulse,
Ladies teeming around as sea gulls,

Did you think it will work or Click,
You ended up bad, getting so sick,
Is it so bad to trust in some Instinct?
Dinosaurs tried this first, got extinct,

I tried something that’s got a Twist,
Come back home with a broken wrist,
But, you can really rely on this Vice,
Smells good and makes you feel nice,

If you are counting on that Unlimited,
It won’t work too well, not even in bed,
If all that you needed is some Essence,
Gift Flowers; always give your presence,

It will definitely pull you down, Gravity,
Love is just too deep, a black hole cavity,
The one that’s really useless is the Musk,
I tried using that every day, dawn to dusk,

No comments on that age old Wild stone,
I don’t want to return with a broken bone,
All that they can do is prevent a swine flu,
Awfully strapping, just between me and you.